Food is comfort for a lot of people. It is what we turn to to self soothe and make us feel better. When we are in the habit of always turning to food to make us feel better, it is important to look at the situation and ask ourselves what it is that we really need to cope with these emotions in the present time. When you find yourself turning to food for self comfort, try asking yourself two questions:
- What am I feeling right now? Try to pinpoint and acknowledge the emotion you are feeling in this moment. It might be guilt, fear, anxiety, shame, stress, or happiness.
- What do I need right now? Sometimes we might need food in order to self-soothe. Food is meant to be pleasurable. There shouldn’t be any guilt around eating something that tastes good or fulfilling a craving. However, if you consistently turn to food when you feel an emotion, you need to stop and ask yourself what it really is that you need right now.
Oftentimes there are four things that you may need in the present moment that don’t have anything to do with food.
- Distraction: How can you pull yourself away from this feeling? Can you give yourself 15 minutes to do something else during this moment and see if the feeling passes? Try taking a walk, watching a funny movie, or listening to your favorite podcast.
- Support: Sometimes when you’re feeling an emotion, you might need somebody to talk to. You can text a friend, call a therapist, or reach out to a family member. You might just need to get these emotions off your chest.
- Deal directly with that emotion: Sometimes just being extremely conscious about your feelings can be very helpful. Read about your emotion. Talk about it to yourself outloud. Write it down on a piece of paper. Listen to music that matches your feelings. Write a letter. Simply sit with your feelings and explore them; sometimes the emotion dissipates.
- Self care: Focusing on self-care can be very therapeutic when coping with emotions. Maybe running to food isn’t what you need right now. Self care looks different for everyone. You might find comfort in giving yourself a hug, laying down for 30 minutes, having alone time in a quiet room with a cup of hot tea, or listening to soothing music and applying a face mask. Perhaps you need to just get rid of all technology and go take a walk to get your body moving. Through these moments of self care, you can give yourself time to think about what you really need right now.
Through distraction, support, dealing with the emotion and self care, you might find that that food might not actually be the thing that helps you cope. When you are emotionally eating, it feels good and comforting in that moment. After 10 minutes, when the food is gone, you are still left with that emotion, but now it is coupled with added guilt and shame because you ate and you didn’t want to do that. Emotional eating is like a Band-Aid for our emotions. It only feels good temporarily. The next time you are turning to food to self soothe, use one of these four suggestions to try to work out your emotions and discover what you really need in that moment.
