Body image has to do with so much more than your physical shape. Actually, our brain takes the largest part in creating our body image and how we feel about our body. Get out paper and a pen because I have eight tips that will help you to build a better body image for yourself.
Tip #1 – Build Awareness Around Self Talk
Take a moment to think about what you tell yourself about your body. Did you compliment yourself or say how good you feel and look with your body? Or, did you list the things to hate or wished were different about your body. Unfortunately, more often than not we speak negatively to ourselves about our body image. Would you speak the way you do to yourself to anyone else you love? Probably not. You would never tell your mom or BFF “you would look so much better if you lost 20lbs?” So… why do you tell yourself that? If you have negative thoughts about your body image consistently, telling yourself positive things all of a sudden wont change that ultimate negative thought. Instead, challenge that negative dialogue. Ask yourself, what makes it okay to talk down to yourself? If you don’t take the time to understand why you talk down to yourself and conquer those reasons, they will continue to rule your life.
Tip #2 – Detox Your Social Media Feed
Social media can be so positive yet so negative all at the same time. Social Media often shows what we think are “perfect bodies” which only adds to how we think about ourselves and we compare ourselves to those images. No one is perfect and we come in all shapes and sizes. With that being said, I want you to be mindful of the messages you are feeding yourself. Throw away magazines that make you feel insecure, unfollow toxic diet or weight loss accounts. Instead, follow accounts that create a positive feeling about your body image or genuinely make you feel good about yourself.
Tip #3 – Gratitude
To create a positive body image we must give ourselves gratitude. Make a list of all the things you are grateful for related to your body and what it can do. It can be as simple as being grateful that your body is able to wake up each morning. When we look at social media it is constantly telling you that if you lose weight you will be happy or if you lose weight you will be loved and accepted. It starts this cycle with ourselves over and over again saying “I can’t have happiness, love, or acceptance until I lose weight” and we lose sight of all the AMAZING things that our body does for us every single day.
Tip #4 – Find Your Identity
Who are you beyond your body? What makes you, you? If we were to sit down to have coffee together and I ask you to “tell me about yourself” you’ll probably talk about your occupation, your family, if you have pets, etc. No one ever says “I have a rockin’ bod” or “I’m super unhappy with my body”. I heard this quote in a podcast and I think it’s so true– Your body is the least interesting thing about you. Ask yourself, why are you loved by others? The answer is because you’re kind, you’re funny, you’re caring… not because you have a certain body shape. Think about 6 characteristics you love about yourself that have nothing to do with your body. Those characteristics will help you find your identity and help you to create a positive image of yourself.
Tip #5 – Set Healthy Boundaries
Be okay with saying “no” when it feels right even when it’s uncomfortable. Boundaries are made to keep you comfortable and usually the people that you’re setting boundaries with are uncomfortable with your boundaries. Those boundaries are there to keep your mental and physical health safe. Some of us are People Pleasers and it may be hard to say no but once we are able to set those boundaries, we are able to grow and build a healthier relationship with yourself which is the goal.
Tip #6 – Give Yourself Permission
Give yourself permission slips at every opportunity you need to. Permission to not be perfect, to eat food, miss a workout, etc. When we don’t give ourselves permission, we beat ourselves up and tear ourselves down. When you DO begin to give yourself permission, that’s when you start to build that trust with your body again.
Tip #7 – Wear Clothes That Fit
Stop holding on to clothes that don’t fit your body. Find clothes that fit your here and now body. When shopping for clothes I want you to start with a comfort test, then move onto style. When you go into the dressing room, try the piece of clothes on facing away from the mirror first. Without looking yet, feel the item out. Does it fit well? Is it tight in the legs or scratchy under the armpits? If it doesn’t fit well or feel good, take it off without looking at it in the mirror. Let’s say the item was tight around the midriff area and we turn around just to peek in the mirror to see, and we start to beat ourselves up… “Ugh my body doesn’t fit in this, I’m too big, well- maybe if I buy it I can lose weight and fit into it later.” We start to talk ourselves into ways we can fit into these clothes instead of getting clothes that fit well and look good now.
Tip #8 – Live Your Best Life!
Ask yourself this, What are you NOT doing in your life right now because you are waiting for your “dream body?” It could be going on a date, or trip, or wearing a bathing suit. Our bodies will never be perfect and that’s okay. If you kept yourself from going to the beach until you had your dream body– you’d never see the beach. Instead, start to say- You know what? I don’t need to wait for my body because this life that’s going right now, this is it! Once we tell ourselves that, we can start to make this life more enjoyable and become happy with ourselves.
Your relationship with your body is the longest relationship you will ever be in! We began with Tip #1, self-talk and the relationship with your body– this is not about going from one extreme to the other, this is not about waking up and saying I love my body. This is about having curiosity and honesty about how we can start to build a better relationship with our body and give it the kindness, empathy, and compassion that I give to others… How can you start to give that to yourself? That’s how we can build a better body image. If you enjoyed reading this blog, I know you will also delight in reading my blog titled: “How To Make Peace With Food”
